I need a vaporizer gun...pronto

Wouldn't that be great? To just get rid of someone, without a trace. Not just anyone though. Only the foulest, most wretched people walking the planet. Like my husbands...oh I dunno what to call her...unfortunate drunken one night stand that turned into a lifetime of torture because she got knocked up. Oh, ahem, sorry...my temper flared there a bit. But seriously, I HATE this woman with every fiber of my being...no kidding here.

He was a 19 year old Canadian kid who had a penchant for alcohol. Being Canadian...he could legally drink at 19, and did...a lot. He got smashed at a party and had sex with this beastly creature. Oddly enough, he remembers nothing of it. Only that he woke up next to her, and walked downstairs to ask his buddies what the hell they were thinking to let him go upstairs with her. They were obviously all drunk too, so they could care less. At that point, with gallons of alcohol flowing through their systems, I'm sure she looked like a hottie. (ooh...uck...I think I just threw up a little)

When she came to him and gave him the preggo news, he was in disbelief. He came right out and told her he didn't want a kid, had no desire to be a father. He then offered to drive her to and from and pay for an abortion. I'm not saying that's right or wrong...I'm not getting political or righteous...just stating the facts. Somewhere in this crazy chicks messed up version of a brain, she though if she had the baby, he would stick around. Again, he re-iterated that would not be the case. She, being the sick headcase that she is, thought he wouldn't have a choice and went ahead with the pregnancy.

Now, my hubby did the right thing. He helped take care of her, watched her while he was going to school and working full time. He made it very clear through all this that he wanted NOTHING to do with psycho mommy chick. He got a job offer in the states, and took it. Pissing off said psycho mommy because her plans to win him with child would not work out. He again told her, I didn't want a kid, this was your choice to keep her. He moved to the states, and has since sent $250 every month to her. None of this money gets to his daughter, as the mom thinks it's far more important to drink and go out than buy her daughter clothes that actually fit her. Now she wants to ship her off to us for the summer, knowing that Kel works 50-60 hours a week and I work a full time 40 hour job as well. My kids go to a sitter during the day, and usually have extra-curricular plans in the evening ie: volleyball, dance, cheering etc. Hmm, can we say 'not fair' to leave her here all day by herself?

I'm not gonna lie, his daughter and I do not see eye to eye. She's not fond of me and I'm not fond of kids who don't listen to adults. Granted, none of this is her fault. She just had the misfortune of being given a wicked human being as a mother. So back to my vaporizer gun. I want it and a time machine. I want to go back to that fateful night 13 years ago and vaporize that scheming, horrible, nasty beast who liked to take advantage of blisteringly drunk younger guys. Life would be so much merrier.

...at least I can enjoy the fact that I can rub it in her face forever more, that I have the man she so desperately tried to keep. HA!!